As a “recovering perfectionist”,
I know the reality all too well…
We perfectionists can be a silly lot.
We have this overwhelming compulsion to do things “right”.
If we’re not careful, we have this terrible terrible tendency to judge and resent others when they’re not doing things “right”.
And we have this deep need to feel that I am right.
It is so constant.
Not just “I am right”, but “I am good.” For some of us, it can take such a moral tone.
And we work so hard to be right! We work so hard to be good!
We work so hard for us and everything we do to be blameless, faultless, above criticism, above reproach.
Because we think that we are either perfect or we’re terrible!
Somewhere along the way, we got the message…
“If I just do it perfectly, if I’m right and good all the time, then I’ll be enough!”
“I just need to work harder, then I’ll be enough.”
“You only deserve something if you work hard!”
Work, work, work! Work comes before play. We don’t sit still very easily.
We tell ourselves, “Once I ____________, then I can relax.”
(spoiler: It never happens! We never get there!)
No matter how hard we try to earn it, it’s never quite enough. Deep inside, we still feel “I could have done more. I SHOULD have done better!”
It’s never good enough. WE are never good enough.
But here’s the truth:
You don’t have to keep earning your worth through effort and achievement.
You can learn to relax that constant vigilance — to let “good enough” actually feel good enough.
You can begin to feel pride without pressure, joy without guilt, and rest without needing to justify it.
When perfectionism softens, something beautiful happens: there’s more space for creativity, connection, laughter, and grace.
You start realizing that being human — messy, flawed, still learning — isn’t failure.
It’s freedom.
In fact, there’s no greater freedom in all the world than the freedom that comes when you live like you’ve got nothing to hide, nothing to lose, and nothing to prove.
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone — and you don’t have to keep pushing so hard on your own.
Let’s start finding freedom from perfectionism today!
Under the supervision of Nancy Golden, LPC (License #001889)
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